Some bitches need to learn to respect their elders

So there's an 18 year old girl who doesn't know me who works with my ex-boyfriend who is technically still supposed to be my bestfriend, which he's not doing a good job at. This is because he likes to tell everyone that I am a mean frigid materialistic girl even though he refused to break up with me for being a prude who loves Chanel. The mean part is just an outrght lie, although this entry may not prove my innocence on that account. BUT, here's a lesson girls, don't judge people over the phone. It earns you a cyber curse.

Here's what happened, so I call my ex at his work like I always do just to chit chat like I usually do. This perky girl answers the phone: "Hello!! This is (Blank) Ranch! How may I help you today?!"

Me: "Hi, may I please speak to ________?"

Her: "SURE!! Who may I ask is calling?!"

Me: (I said my name)

Her: "oh. ok." (excitement gone, CLEARLY JUDGMENTAL DISAPPROVING TONE)

She then proceeds to put me on MUTE as the bitch clearly was talking shit, comes back and says he's busy right now. Can he call you back later?

UH NO. HE CAN'T. I LIVE IN LONDON. BITCH.

When I speak to him later, he vehemently denies that she talked shit at all, but why would she put me on mute then?? And even if she didn't say anything, I bet she rolled her eyes. I know this because, one time, when he was speaking to a friend of mine about me, the girl actually said outloud, "OH GOD, I HOPE YOU ARE NOT PLANNING TO GET BACK WITH HER AGAIN."

TELL ME THAT ISN'T RUDE? I haven't seen the little snotty brat. But next time I step foot in that building looking fucking fantastic for lunch, the bitch better watch out. RESPECT YOUR ELDERS, because I WILL SLAP YOU WITH MY DELCIATE BUT TOUGH A NAILS PIMP HAND.

This situation is ridiculous. Its the voice equivalent to the "Face girl" incident in Sex and the City. Judgment by name from someone who doesn't even know both sides of the story! Whatever. I know I am nice....and I never said I wasn't materilistic.

FYI

This blog is SUPPOSED to be absolutely ridiculous.

There was a time when Heaven = Hogwarts

BUT AN EPIC NEW DAWN HAS ARRIVED...AND THAT DAWN IS TWILIGHT!!!!! ITS A HARD DECISION NOW BUT I HAVE COME TO A CONCLUSION AT THE END FOR OTHERS OF YOU WHO HAVE TROUBLE DECIDING.

Ok. Here is specimen A: Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Its Glorious.

Ok. Here is Specimen B: A forest. Somewhere in Forks Washington.



Its a forest.

BUT!!! Here's the twist!! Somewhere in this forest...this lurks!!




Hottie Vampires/Werewolves!!

or this:

LOL Sienna Miller looking like a trashy Russian prostitute in the middle of a forest...she could be a vampire......

Then what do I choose?!! Hot boys in a forest. Magical school with Chanel wizarding robes. Its a hard decision. Until I remembered this:

You see where the red arrows are pointing?? Edward Cullens...or his secret identity Cedric Diggory.....exists in the world of Hogwarts too!!!

He even dates an asian chick!!! Which means that I don't have to keep wishing to be a hottie white girl....except I would not be caught dead in that dress.




Oriental splendor? Come on.

Anyway, the moral of the story is this. Like I said to my BFF Veronica, you can have your Edward Cullen and your cake and eat it too.

I've found the common factor in both my heavens...looks like me and Edward are meant to be no matter which one I choose!! HAHAHAHA!!!

Its not recent but this Junya Watanabe leather trench is...

SO AWESOME IT MAKES ME WANT TO CRAP MY PANTS!!

Imagine the ass kicking possibilities. Just looking at it makes me want to run outside and be a super hero.